Bullpitt!

Bullpitt!

Company type	Television series
Industry	Entertainment
Founded	1997
Founder	Gary Reilly, Tony Sattler
Headquarters	Australia
Products	Television comedy series
Parent	RS Productions

Bullpitt! was an Australian comedic television series broadcast between 1997 and 1998 on the Seven Network. It revived the central character from the 1980s sitcom Kingswood Country. Developed by Gary Reilly and Tony Sattler, the program starred Ted Bullpitt, portrayed by Ross Higgins, who was now depicted as single and residing in a retirement community. The series preserved Ted's well-known catchphrases like "Pickle me grandmother!" and "Money on the fridge". The ensemble cast featured Elaine Lee, Peter Whitford, Bruce Spence, Vanessa Downing, Jacqueline Brennan, and Kirstie Hutton, who played Ted’s university-enrolled granddaughter, Tessa "Terri" Bertolucci. Produced by RS Productions, the show also included appearances by numerous prominent Australian actors in guest roles.

In 1998, Bullpitt! received a Logie Award nomination for Most Popular Comedy Program but was ultimately bested by Full Frontal. Out of the 26 episodes produced, thirteen were issued on DVD as The Best of Bullpitt! Volume 1. The entire series was later released on DVD by Via Vision Entertainment in 2023.

Main/regular

• Ross Higgins as Edward Melba "Ted" Bullpitt – Now retired and living at Whispering Pines Retirement Village, Ted continues to drive his cherished Kingswood. He displays mounted trophies of his former Greyhound racing dogs and keeps a goldfish named Kieren. Known for his irritable nature, Ted frequently uses catchphrases such as "Wasn't me. I love that bloody cat" when denying any mischief around the village.
• Jacquie Brennan as Samantha MacDonald – The overworked and single manager of the retirement village, recognized for her relentless efforts to find romantic partners.
• Vanessa Downing as Muriel Johnstone – Married to Johnno, she often embarrasses him with blunt comments about his flatulence. Muriel shares leftovers with Ted and has a colorful history including stories of meeting her ideal man at her wedding.
• Kirstie Hutton as Tessa "Terri" Bertolucci – Ted’s 19-year-old granddaughter attending university who moves into the retirement home. She is known for her rebellious behavior, including participating in protests and streaking during cricket matches.
• Elaine Lee as Joan Collins – A former Logie-winning actress and sex-obsessed resident who authors a senior sex guidebook and frequently makes advances toward Ted.
• Bruce Spence as Darcy Kelso (The Shadow) – The groundskeeper who cultivates cannabis in Ted’s garden and proposes questionable cost-cutting plans.
• Peter Whitford as John Cazaley "Johnno" Johnstone – Ted’s closest friend, a competitive Rotarian who drives a Ford Falcon and is known for comical attempts to conceal his adult entertainment materials from his wife Muriel.

Guests

• Danny Adcock as Terry, a Grade 3 Telstra Supervisor driving a Commodore station wagon authorized for limited personal use. He arrives at the village to rescue Telstra Installations worker Dave Goddard, who has been abducted by residents demanding phone repairs. Terry himself is also taken hostage after declaring Telstra does not negotiate with terrorists. Both are held captive by Joan as unwilling sex slaves.
• Robina Beard as Gwen the Ranger, who confronts Ted over cruelty to Magpies after he attempts to detonate firecrackers near them ("Bullpitt Method") and investigates suspicious deaths involving Gay Akubra and Repco Lad.
• Neville Bonner appearing as himself, officiates the Australia Day Citizenship ceremony at which Dr Khan becomes an Australian citizen. Ted mistakenly refers to him as Arnold.
• John Clayton portrays a Judge who acquits Ted of wilful damage after he demolishes a speed bump with a front end loader, following an altercation triggered by the bump’s illegality.
• Barry Crocker appears as himself judging the village Home Brew competition. Ted cheats by substituting VB, but due to an error is accidentally served urine instead of his concoction dubbed "Bullpitt Bitter" (BB).
• Drew David plays Damian, partner of Roxanne, a Weight Loss saleswoman photographer.
• Ernie Dingo features as himself judging a Garden Gnome contest and awarding Whispering Pines over Royal Oaks after Ted pranks residents by painting gnomes black. He later gifts Ted an Aboriginal flag for Neville.
• Kate Fitzpatrick as Helga Hansen, Johnno’s secret online girlfriend from Sweden. She visits unexpectedly, unaware that Johnno gave out Ted’s address and Darcy’s photo, causing ongoing confusion.
• Dawn Fraser appears as herself, nearly purchasing Villa No.39, known locally as the "Villa of Death." Residents hesitate to warn her; she eventually decides not to buy it.
• Anne Fulwood appears as herself.
• Kevin Golsby portrays Derek Roving, a reporter for TV News and host of the current affairs program Probe.
• Kenneth Goodlet plays Cardinal Fitzgerald, who reopens the village’s renovated heated indoor pool. A prank replaces inflatable pool toys with inflatable sex dolls purchased by Darcy.
• Brendan Higgins appears as Father Paul performing an Exorcism on Villa No.39.
• John Hinde features as himself assisting Joan in promoting her senior sex book titled "You're Never Too Old."
• Shan Jayaweera portrays Dr Khan, the village’s exchange medical practitioner from Bangladesh, known for surprising Ted and preparing national dishes. He later gains Australian citizenship and has a brother veterinarian based in Sydney.
• Colin McEwan plays Bob Bullpitt, Ted’s older brother engaged in questionable timeshare grave sales in Surfers Paradise. He twice attempts to defraud Ted out of $5,000 and steals Ted’s Kingswood for a contest win but is foiled by Terri’s intervention.
• Ray Meagher appears as himself/Alf Stewart, whose lost Rottweiler "Tiny" occupies Ted’s chair. Tiny enjoys watching Home and Away. The owner retrieves Tiny with reference to returning to Summer Bay.
• Genevieve Mooy plays Roxanne, a dubious Weight Loss executive. Ted and Johnno pretend to be overweight to win $1,000 and a trip to Tahiti but become involved with NSW Fraud Squad officers staking out Ted’s villa; Roxanne and partner Damian are arrested.
• Max Phipps portrays the Archbishop of London, a Nobel Prize-winning author and Joan’s ex-husband. After overeating Ted and Johnno’s pickled onions, he abruptly ends a speech at the village and shares one last liaison with Joan.
• Oscar Redding plays Scott, photographer for Susan Winchester.
• Elaine Smith appears as Susan Winchester, a journalist interviewing Joan for Who magazine about her sex book; Ted acts as Joan’s husband during the interview.
• Theo Stephens plays Dave Goddard, Telstra Installations worker abducted by villagers demanding telephone line repairs. After being rescued he quits Telstra for Australia Post but is later kidnapped again by Ted over a delayed cheque affecting his license renewal.
• Stuart Wagstaff portrays Tyrone Wilde, Joan’s shady former lover who tries to swindle Joan and Muriel out of $5,000 but is stopped when Muriel steals his passport to prevent him fleeing to New Zealand.