Fearsome Tales for Fiendish Kids

Fearsome Tales for Fiendish Kids

Company type	Children's book
Industry	Publishing
Founded	1996
Founder	Jamie Rix
Products	Children's dark comedy horror short story collection
Parent	Hodder Children's Books

Fearsome Tales for Fiendish Kids is a 1996 children's dark comedy horror collection authored by British writer Jamie Rix. As the third installment in the Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids series, it was released by Hodder Children's Books and represents the final volume before the CITV animated adaptation. This book features 16 short stories, one more than prior editions.

The Cat Burglar

Fedora Funklefink, a cunning con artist, manipulates those around her to shirk duties and earn quick cash. She charges girls for toilet access, forges her mother's signature to avoid P.E., sells mints to peers, demands payment from her father for washing his car, and cheats on exams using mirrors. Upon seeing a £10 reward poster for a lost cat, Fedora kidnaps a black stray and attempts to pass it off as the missing pet. Despite disguising the cat with paint and polish, the owner remains unconvinced.

Fedora’s further efforts to claim rewards with various animals and items are rejected by the owner. When a cat matching the description is struck by a car, Fedora revives it with a bicycle pump and deceives the family into paying £20 using ventriloquism. Angela, the cat’s owner, eventually rewards Fedora with £50 after bathing the animal.

Celebrating her success, Fedora then notices a £5,000 reward poster nearby. Turning around, she encounters a circus tiger that promptly devours her. Later, the circus owner discovers the tiger asleep due to a stomach ache.

Mr. Peeler's Butterflies

Alexander employs multiple strategies to stay awake past his 7:30pm bedtime, annoying his weary parents by feigning interest in protecting his room from shadows, hiding toys, and requesting water to delay sleep. His parents, particularly his father, become increasingly irritated, but Alexander keeps up his innocent facade.

By four o'clock, Alexander finally falls asleep. His window latch creaks open as a sardine scent fills the room. He wakes in terror and calls for his parents. His father angrily checks the window—it’s shut—but only his mother notices the sardine smell after finding an empty sardine tin. Alexander denies any joke. His father mentions "Mr Peeler," a figure from an old nursery rhyme, then leaves with his wife, instructing Alexander not to disturb them again.

The window latch opens once more, and a man dressed in tweed carrying a butterfly net enters, accompanied by peculiar butterflies. Introducing himself as Mr Peeler, he informs Alexander he cannot summon help because his parents are in a deep sleep. Peeler uses a key to open sardine tins and peels off Alexander's eyelids, catching butterflies and attaching the eyelids to his own face before floating away through the window, leaving Alexander unable to fall asleep.

Fat Boy with a Trumpet [a true story]

An anonymous pupil recounts how Johnny Bullneck—the school’s most feared bully, an overweight and pale twelve-year-old—tormented classmates with arbitrary punishments. One tale involves Johnny forcing a boy named Miles to find three gallons of polka dot paint; after complying, Miles disappears and is rumored to have moved away under an alias.

A new student named Timothy arrives—also overweight and wearing glasses—carrying a trumpet case and quickly gains popularity through playground performances. Johnny targets Timothy by ordering him to undress for a fake "medical photo," resulting in Timothy being detained when the bell rings. The bullying escalates as Johnny forces laxatives on Timothy, steals his glasses, and mocks his weight. A girl named Tina briefly defends Timothy by retrieving his glasses from Johnny; however, Johnny then seizes the trumpet case instead. Timothy’s firm grip on the case silences Johnny for a week.

Johnny borrows the school's cricket gear and ambushes Timothy after school during a thunderstorm. His gang ties Timothy up in front of the goal net while Johnny boasts about his planned revenge—playing Timothy's trumpet as cricket balls are hurled at him. Wearing Timothy’s glasses, Johnny starts playing but is suddenly struck by nearby lightning. His gang flees in panic as the rain ceases, revealing Johnny’s burnt statue with glowing red frames on his glasses.

In the epilogue, the narrator remarks that nobody mourned Johnny's death announced at assembly but admits wishing Johnny had endured more suffering during the accident instead of dying instantly as stated by the headmaster.

The Chipper Chums Go Scrumping

During the summer of 1952, Algie traveled to Kent to spend holidays with his aunt Fanny and uncle Herbert, accompanied by his dog Stinker and his friend Col. Together with local children—siblings Alice and Ginger, whose father was a Royal Navy captain, and the spirited tomboy Sam, who stood up to the neighborhood bully Dick Stick—they formed a group called The Chipper Chums.

One morning, the gang set off for a picnic, bringing along treats provided by their families such as scones, tomatoes, gingerbread men, Victoria sponge cake, sardine sandwiches, spam, and ginger beer. After cycling to a river adjacent to an apple orchard, they ate and then dozed beneath the warm sun. Upon awakening, Sam proposed returning home, but Alice insisted on picking an apple from the orchard. Although Col expressed reservations about scrumping, the group decided that taking a few apples unnoticed was unlikely to cause trouble.

They squeezed through a gap in the fence; Algie climbed onto Sam’s shoulders to reach the fruit. Suddenly, Farmer Tregowan appeared brandishing a shotgun after hearing a gunshot. Stinker bravely jumped to defend the children but was fatally shot at close range. Algie threatened to inform his father, yet Tregowan remained unyielding. Despite their attempts to apologize and accept any consequences, Tregowan was determined to seek retribution.

Using insecticide found in the orchard, Tregowan incapacitated the children before crushing their bodies in his fruit press to produce cider juice. The tale ends with a cautionary note against consuming "Tregowan's Vintage Cider from 1952."

Prince Noman

In the desert settlement of Misery, governed for more than four centuries by the House of Volgar, King Norman marries Letitia, a young peasant woman who soon gives birth to a son. During the naming ceremony, the king misreads the intended name "Norman" as "Noman," a term carrying unfavorable implications. The prince begins displaying disturbing behaviors such as becoming invisible, causing alarm within the royal household amid the king’s deteriorating health. Letitia creates a lead-lined babygrow and balaclava designed to contain his invisibility; however, the royal physician declares him unfit for rulership. Although Noman is nominated as heir, Letitia warns that Misery would not accept a ruler without a visible face. Facing threats from Princess Florrie, Letitia succeeds in restoring Noman’s original visage by the following day. Subsequently, the family withdraws from public life and orders all mirrors in the palace to be destroyed.

Death By Chocolate

At Squarebrush Sou’wester chocolate factory, production grinds to a halt when a fly is discovered contaminating an Easter chocolate bunny. This tainted bunny is purchased by Serena Slurp’s mother. Serena, an obsessive chocolate lover despite having ample supplies already stored away, keeps it hidden. Her younger sister Ellie often uses their mother’s fly swatter to hunt flies until Serena breaks it and coerces Ellie into servitude by holding the broken swatter over her as leverage. Their mother remains largely oblivious to this situation.

A heatwave in late August causes a nationwide shortage of chocolate that devastates Serena’s reserves. In desperation, she consumes the contaminated bunny containing fly eggs. A maggot hatches inside her stomach and merges with her DNA, transforming her into a massive fly-like being. Ellie discovers this horrifying transformation and kills the creature using the fly swatter. When their mother questions what happened, Ellie admits breaking the swatter; her mother dismisses it as insignificant.

Well 'Ard Willard

Willard, alienated due to his passion for science, adopts the image of a worldly and gifted boy to earn respect at school. Known as "Well 'Ard Willard" because of his tough and serious attitude, he boasts about having stolen the sun, provoking skepticism and intrigue among his classmates. To uphold his bold claim, he vows to provide proof by Monday.

Over the weekend, Willard employs a burning glass method to gather sunbeam particles inside jam jars, which he then inspects under a microscope. Meanwhile, his parents observe strange occurrences such as prematurely early sunsets and an unusually overheated bedroom, coinciding with news reports about the sun apparently shrinking.

When Monday arrives, the school's closure sends Willard home, where his sunburned look raises doubts. Upon questioning, he concocts a tale involving a time machine to justify his condition. The local authorities grow suspicious of him stealing the sun due to the glowing room, heightening his parents' worries.

In a desperate move, Willard releases the captured sunbeams from his window; these particles merge into a glowing orb that detonates and reignites as the sun rises once more. Tragically, the explosion fatally wounds Willard. His parents find only his remains, and weeks later, his liquefied body falls like rain over Madagascar.

Athlete's Foot

Oliver "Ollie" Littlebody consistently struggles in track events, always trailing behind his competitor Anthony St John Smythe, who revels in each victory. After yet another humiliating defeat, an elderly man offers to coach Ollie into becoming an elite athlete. Though doubtful, Ollie accepts the help. The regimen includes daily chores such as purchasing and preparing soup for the old man, which Ollie begrudgingly completes.

Before Ollie's first league race, the old man presents him with spiked running shoes once owned by Tommy Knock, a talented runner from half a century ago who never won his final race. Donning these shoes, Ollie wins and continues to excel in subsequent competitions, earning acclaim as Britain's top 400m youth athlete in a magazine owned by the St John Smythe family. Anthony begins to suspect Ollie's sudden improvement.

Just prior to the championship race, Anthony steals Ollie's shoes and traps him using glue. The old man rescues Ollie, who initially wishes to withdraw but is persuaded to compete barefoot. During the race, Anthony takes an early lead but abruptly disintegrates as if struck by a Luftwaffe bomb—mirroring Tommy Knock’s demise in 1941. Ollie finishes in seventh place.

The old man reveals that Tommy Knock died similarly during his last race. While Ollie expresses sorrow for this fate, the old man comforts him before vanishing in a wisp of smoke.

The Matchstick Girl

Polly Peach is an eight-year-old girl living with her parents and fifteen siblings in Victorian Britain. After her father loses his job at the steel mill, Polly begins selling matchboxes, earning two pence for every twenty sold. When her employer arbitrarily reduces her pay to one penny per twenty matches, Polly threatens to go on strike. Suddenly, a flash of phosphorescence ignites her hair, transforming her into a giant match. Her boss exploits her transformed body to clean the shag from his smoking pipe before discarding what remains into an ashtray, then closes his shop and departs for a holiday in Blackpool.

Simon Sulk

The narrative begins with an Icelandic myth about trolls, originally sea beings, who centuries ago attacked villagers in Trollvik after transforming from travelers seeking shelter. These creatures were eventually driven away by King Magnus.

In the current timeline, the pampered Simon opposes his parents' decision to relocate to Devon, throwing tantrums over his new school attire. He barricades himself in his room, determined not to come out. When his parents secretly return after moving away, they falsely claim the house is ablaze and urge him to evacuate. Simon refuses despite their insistence. Ultimately, they break down the door; Simon concedes but remains adamant about staying. At that instant, his parents transform into Icelandic trolls and behead him.

Later, Simon’s actual parents revisit and encounter the Icelandic couple who exchanged homes with them. The couple explains Simon’s obstinacy and helps convince him to leave. They then host a modest housewarming gathering in their garden, grilling large portions of chicken on a barbecue.

The Dumb Clucks

The Cluck family lives in Dork, Stargazy Pie—a village notorious for its simple-minded inhabitants. During a rainy day, a cowboy smoking a cheroot arrives, claiming to be the Son of God and his father’s messenger. He promises to fulfill wishes if villagers perform certain rituals. Mrs Cluck asks for hair rollers; a child desires a hoverboard; Mr Cluck requests new golf clubs. The cowboy instructs them to destroy mirrors, scatter glass shards around the village, burn their shoes, and coat themselves in ketchup and mustard. Mr Pojo, the local cobbler, accuses the cowboy of fraud but is ignored and expelled for blasphemy.

The cowboy summons “his father” by dialing 666 on his phone. A massive cyclops named Nigel appears, exposing the cowboy’s trickery. Surrounded by a ring of glass and barefoot, the villagers are consumed by Nigel, who then departs with his son for Bombay. Subsequently, a new settlement called Pojo is founded with only Mr Pojo as its inhabitant.

Doctor Moribundus

Lorelei Lee often pretends to be ill to skip school, using elaborate ruses to convince her family. When she fakes a seizure, an emergency physician detects her deception and prescribes an unusual remedy. Soon after, Dr Moribundus and his night nurse arrive at her home. Specializing in alternative treatments, Moribundus insists on treating Lorelei despite her resistance, applying leeches and mustard poultices before conducting unconventional “brain surgery.” He removes the section responsible for her malingering and consumes it.

Following this traumatic procedure, Lorelei attends school regularly but remains cautious of illness, fearing Moribundus’ return. A persistent hole in her tongue and a head wound requiring staples serve as lasting reminders. In Latin class, when asked about Medicus moribundus, she humorously refers to the injection, much to her teacher’s amusement.

The Stick Men

Throughout his life, Chico has continuously decorated walls with felt tips, much to the frustration of his affluent, work-driven parents who frequently reprimand him. One day, Chico's mother is appalled to discover his bedroom walls covered with stick people and sketched buildings. In response, she and Chico's father impose a two-day grounding and assign an indifferent babysitter. Undeterred, Chico persists in drawing, inventing the magical realm of Fiddle-Dee-Dee, featuring a mystical river inhabited by a blind sorceress residing in a castle, alongside Knobbly Hobgoblins hiding in caves. The babysitter harshly belittles Chico's artistic efforts.

A stick figure named Stan detaches from the wall to soothe Chico. Soon, additional characters appear, seizing Chico's pens and covering every wall with drawings as Chico grows anxious. The hobgoblin chief sketches the babysitter with a serpent emerging from her phone; this is followed by a scream and the front door slamming shut. The hobgoblin then draws crashing helicopters, but Chico erases them and drives the creature away.

Magically, Chico is transported to the sorceress’ castle, where she expresses gratitude and reveals that a human presence in Fiddle-Dee-Dee brings stick figures to life. Although tempted to remain, Chico feels obligated to return to his parents. Through a window, he observes their anger over the mess. His father arrives with soapy water, washing away the castle depicted on the wall, which traps Chico inside Fiddle-Dee-Dee indefinitely.

The epilogue shows Chico happily living among his new companions; the inhabitants transform into humans, the sorceress regains her sight, and his world becomes enchanted once more. Meanwhile, his parents perish in a helicopter crash; their recovered bodies have heads swollen to five times their normal size.

Little Fingers

Daffyd Thomas has a shriveled thumb caused by persistent childhood thumb sucking, resulting in restless hands. His parents frequently chastise him for unsanitary finger habits. Feeling overwhelmed, they leave Daffyd with his 93-year-old deaf grandmother, Gwenyth, as they depart on a week-long vacation. Daffyd dreads enduring her lengthy stories about her youth.

After four days confined with Gwenyth’s never-ending tales, Daffyd resorts to prank calls until he reaches an Italian pizza place offering a "Kidnapped Caper." When he answers the door, a man wearing sunglasses and carrying a machine gun forcibly abducts him into a limousine, knocking him unconscious.

Over a week later, Daffyd’s parents return to find ransom notes accompanied by envelopes filled with fingers. Gwenyth admits she was unaware of his disappearance. Mr Thomas pays £10,000 ransom; Daffyd comes back home with only one thumb left. His mother is relieved that he will no longer fidget, but he continues thumb sucking. His father suggests searching for the Bitter Aloe.

Bessy O'Messy

Bessy is an Irish girl with red hair and green eyes, notorious for being careless and forgetful. Her brother Callum, obsessed with tidiness, constantly cleans up after her, which makes Bessy suspicious of his motives. One morning their mother discovers an enormous pile of dirty laundry and orders Bessy to tidy her room. When Bessy refuses and Callum offers assistance, their mother denies both requests. Bessy tries to climb the laundry heap but falls through it and lands outside a cottage inhabited by six leprechauns all named O’Reilly (real name Rafferty). These leprechauns favor disorderly environments, which appeals to Bessy, and she consents to live with them.

Inside the cottage, the leprechauns inform Bessy that she must serve as their housekeeper and clean whenever instructed. She protests that no such agreement was made. The leprechauns threaten her with their claws if she refuses. Bessy manages to escape but is cornered; suddenly a jet of water disperses the leprechauns and causes the world around her to collapse.

Later on, Callum discovers Bessy reduced to 6 inches tall with white hair. She apologizes for her previous behavior and offers to assist him in cleaning her room.

Jack in a Box

The Honourable Jack Delaunay de Havilland De Trop frequently causes discomfort to his noble parents by interrupting conversations with adults, including the Queen and the Prime Minister. During his sister’s birthday celebration, he disrupts Mr. Frankenstein, a ventriloquist hired for entertainment, isolating him from the other guests and persistently bothering him. Jack then overhears faint voices coming from Frankenstein’s suitcase, which contains a ventriloquist dummy that fastens itself around Jack’s neck, urging him to flee.

Frankenstein explains that the dummy possesses magical properties and offers to educate Jack about the Elders of the Black Circle, providing an address card directing him to a joke shop located in Great Pessaries.

The following day, Jack ventures alone into the joke shop. Inside, he observes severed children’s heads suspended above tanks filled with formaldehyde; these heads animate and warn him to leave immediately. Frankenstein reappears wielding an axe as Jack begs for mercy.

Several weeks later, Jack’s parents remain worried about their daughter, who repeatedly murmurs for her brother to come back. Lord Delaunay de Havilland De Trop presents a dummy purchased from the joke shop in an attempt to comfort her; Lady Delaunay comments on how much it resembles Jack. The dummy then blinks.

Development

Jamie Rix drew inspiration from his own life experiences and the cautionary book Struwwelpeter when creating this series. For "Little Fingers," he remembered how his mother bought him Struwwelpeter to help stop his thumb-sucking habit, which influenced the story’s theme. The ambiguous conclusion of this tale reflects that personal connection. Additionally, Rix based "Dr Moribundus" on himself, recalling how he pretended to be ill by manipulating a thermometer’s mercury to avoid attending school. He wittily noted parallels between this story and the film Hannibal.

Ross Collins originally illustrated the front cover. After the series was adapted into a cartoon aired on CITV, Honeycomb Animation—responsible for production—redesigned the covers.

The book ceased publication in May 2005 but was briefly reissued as a Kindle edition in 2011.

Cultural references, naming conventions

Humor is woven throughout the short stories by means of cultural allusions and naming conventions. Several titles incorporate play on words: "The Matchstick Girl" features Polly Peach transforming into a matchstick after defying her employer; "Athlete's Foot" cleverly references both a fungal infection and enchanted trainers that guarantee victories; "The Cat Burglar" connects Fedora’s cons, a missing feline named Tiddles, and the term cat burglar; "Jack in a Box" concludes with Jack’s father unveiling a dummy unrelated to the traditional children’s toy. The character Mr Frankenstein alludes to Dr Frankenstein through his use of human anatomy in crafting lifelike creations.

Character names often reflect their traits: Bessy O'Messy is notably untidy; Serena Slurp is both rude and greedy, hinting at poor dining etiquette. Johnny Bullneck is described as “short-haired, flat-footed, pale-skinned and stout,” with “bull neck” indicating a thick neck. In "The Dumb Clucks," place names emphasize family intellect: they reside in Dork village among other Dorks within Stargazy Pie (a Cornish dessert), located between peaks named Feak and Weeble—a spoonerism implying “weak” and “feeble-minded.” The House of Volgar in "Prince Noman" hints at the royal family’s unpleasant disposition well before Queen Letitia became an outcast after bearing a prince.

Irony is evident in names such as Mr Peeler, referencing the phrase "keep your eyes peeled," as he removes Alexander's eyelids. Moribundus (Latin for moribund) connects to Lorelei Lee's aversion to Latin at school and relates to the unfulfilled prescription Medicus moribundus ("Doctor moribund"). The once “well'ard” Willard suffers internal melting caused by the sun he stole; the epilogue comments: "From the outset, Willard had been lying to save his skin. But what use is a skin when there's nothing left to go inside it?"

Pastiche

"The Chipper Chums Go Scrumping" serves as a full-plot homage to Enid Blyton's The Famous Five series, emulating Blyton’s narrative style, especially evident in the vivid descriptions of food and character conversations. The tale follows a group of youngsters and their canine companion enjoying a picnic in the rural southern English coastal region, reminiscent of Blyton’s fictional Kirrin Bay setting. Ross Collins’ original artwork includes the phrase "and lashings of ginger beer!", frequently misattributed to Blyton herself but actually originating from the Channel 4 spoof Five Go Mad in Dorset.

Characters from the Chipper Chums closely mirror Blyton’s iconic cast: Algie channels Dick with his adventurous nature and an aunt named Fanny; Sam reflects George as a tomboyish figure with a traditionally male name who resents being labeled female; Alice shares qualities with Anne as the youngest child who carries a teddy bear; and Stinker alludes to the typical dogs found in Blyton’s narratives. The character Dick Stick may be influenced by the crude Edgar from Five Run Away Together.

Farmer Tregowan represents a stereotypical Cornish antagonist—hostile and disagreeable—paralleling the unfriendly male figures often overcome in The Famous Five. His use of insecticide to outwit the children underscores his effectiveness as an adversary. Alongside characters such as Lou, a working-class acrobat, and Mrs Stick, themes of class prejudice and social hierarchy emerge, reflecting longstanding critiques of Blyton’s portrayal of snobbery and entitlement among her characters. The Chipper Chums themselves exhibit comparable attitudes, evident when they dismiss the impoverished Sticks despite their own privileged conduct.

Class and social dynamics permeate the narrative: Sam’s retaliation against Dick Stick’s taunts, her critical view of Tregowan’s appearance, and the children’s insistence on forgiveness after pilfering apples all highlight their sense of entitlement. These subtleties were toned down in the CITV adaptation by reducing Dick Stick’s teasing and removing Sam’s internal criticisms.

Adaptations

The audiobook version was narrated by Nigel Planer, who also provided narration for the animated series and co-founded Jamie Rix's Little Brother Productions. Initially released in December 2000 by Chivers Children's Audio Books, it was later reissued through Audible on 16 August 2016.

Among all stories, "The Matchstick Girl" remains the sole narrative not adapted for either the CITV or NickToons animated series, likely due to its brevity.

Various adaptations introduced modifications to original content:

• "Doctor Moribundus" (Series 1, Episode 13) excluded Loralilee's brain surgery scene.
• "The Chipper Chums Go Scrumping" (Series 1, Episode 10):
  • Characters such as Algie's aunt and uncle along with other parental figures were omitted.
  • The plot advances directly to the children heading to their picnic following Dick Stick’s introduction.
  • Stinker's death was changed to an injury on a hind leg; he is shown limping past Tregowan's cider shed instead of being killed.
• "The Cat Burglar" (Series 2, Episode 3) substantially cut Fedora's backstory involving her con artist activities.
• In "Mr. Peeler's Butterflies" (Series 2, Episode 4), Alexander’s father warns that Mr. Peeler will come for him if he refuses bedtime.
• "Well'ard Willard" (Series 2, Episode 13) concludes with melting caused by a solar supernova event.
• "The Dumb Clucks," retitled "The Dumb Klutzes" (Series 6, Episode 8), modified family surnames and removed references to Christian religious figures.
• "Jack in a Box" (Series 2, Episode 1):
  • Mr Frankenstein was renamed Twigtaylor and depicted with more vibrant characteristics.
  • Great Pessaries became Great Pudden.
  • The mad scientist theme was softened by eliminating implications involving mutilated children.
• "Fat Boy with a Trumpet" removed its anonymous student framing narrative.

Reissues

Release date	Format	Page count	Publisher	Remarks	ISBN
8 April 1996	Hardcover	216–224	Hodder Children's Books		978-0340667354
2000	Paperback	216–224		Cover art by Honeycomb Animation	978-0340640951
2000/2001	Audio Cassette	319 minutes	Chivers Children's Audio Books	Narrated by Nigel Planer	9780754051992
2011	Amazon Kindle	114 pages	Amazon (Jamie Rix)		1908285044
15 September 2011	eAudiobook	5h 19m 10s	AudioGO	Based on Chivers Audio Books recording	1408449102
16 August 2016	MP3 Audiobook		Brilliance Audio (Amazon Studio)	Derived from Chivers Audio Books production	9781531807399

Individual stories

The tales "Death By Chocolate" and "The Barber of Civil" were reissued in 1998 by Macmillan Children's Books within the short story compilation Scary Stories for Eight Year Olds. "Death By Chocolate," along with other narratives such as "The Chipper Chums Go Scrumping" and "Prince Noman," appeared in issue 28 of the Braille at Bedtime series published by the Royal National Institute of Blind People. Additional stories like "Well'ard Willard," "The Matchstick Girl," and "Athlete's Foot" were included in issue 38, while issue 40 featured "Bessy O'Messy" and "Jack in a Box."