Up the Chastity Belt

Up the Chastity Belt

Company type	Film
Industry	Film industry
Founded	1971
Founder	Bob Kellett (director), Sid Colin, Ray Galton, Alan Simpson (screenwriters)
Products	Film

Up the Chastity Belt (known in the U.S. as Naughty Knights; alternatively titled The Chastity Belt) is a British comedic film from 1971, directed by Bob Kellett and featuring Frankie Howerd in the lead role. The screenplay was crafted by Sid Colin, Ray Galton, and Alan Simpson. This movie represents the second installment in a trilogy of film adaptations derived from the television series Up Pompeii! (1969–1970), following Up Pompeii (1971) and preceding Up the Front (1972).

Plot

Twins named Lurkalot and Richard are born to Eleanor of Aquitaine. A faction of nobles, headed by Sir Braggart de Bombast, kidnaps Lurkalot and abandons him in a forest, where he is subsequently raised among pigs owned by Sir Coward de Custard. Sir Coward eventually takes Lurkalot in as a serf. In the nearby village, Lurkalot supports Sir Coward by vending love potions, chastity belts, and various inventions.

Richard becomes restless with his rule over England and decides to join the Third Crusade. Meanwhile, Sir Braggart aims to claim Sir Coward’s estates and win over his daughter, Lady Lobelia. After a rejected proposal, Sir Braggart challenges Sir Coward to a duel for Lady Lobelia’s hand. Disguised as the "Man with no name," Lurkalot defeats Sir Braggart’s champion by employing a large magnet. Declaring the duel invalid, Sir Braggart escalates matters by declaring war. To safeguard Lady Lobelia, Lurkalot secures her within a chastity belt.

Sir Coward flees to participate in the crusades, with Lurkalot following to locate both him and Richard. Upon arriving in the Holy Land, Lurkalot uncovers that the crusades serve as a pretext for indulgence; Richard remains behind with Scheherazade, studying the Kama Sutra. Motivated by mysterious voices, Lurkalot converts unused weaponry into chastity belts and backs Saladin’s women during their strike, compelling Richard to return home.

In Germany, Richard resides with a local woman, leaving Lurkalot to assume control of the crown. Upon returning to England, Lurkalot faces accusations of witchcraft after escaping imprisonment via a flying machine. Sentenced to death, he is saved by Robin Hood. Alongside Sir Coward—now emboldened—they devise plans to confront Sir Braggart.

Following complications with his German companion, Richard flees back to England and is mistaken for Lurkalot. Sir Coward pretends to be ill in order to infiltrate the castle but experiences withdrawal symptoms from his hookah pipe. While preparing medicine, Lurkalot inadvertently creates gunpowder ("gone powder"), which they utilize to breach the castle gate during Robin Hood’s assault.

During a duel between Lurkalot and Sir Braggart, it is revealed that Sir Braggart is actually Richard’s twin; however, he eventually escapes. Richard resumes his reign, consents to marry Lady Lobelia, and knights Lurkalot—who wins Lady Lobelia’s affection—while Richard returns to Scheherazade.

Production

Financial backing for the film was provided by the Robert Stigwood Organisation. The original concept was developed by Sid Cole, with the screenplay penned by Galton and Simpson—both represented by Beryl Vertue—since Talbot Rothwell was engaged with Carry On productions.

Frankie Howerd negotiated a share of the profits but later expressed disappointment with the final cut of the film, citing an excess of footage and last-minute script additions that complicated editing. Producer Ned Sherrin had requested additional material when the film's length proved insufficient; however, much of this extra footage was ultimately unused, resulting in a somewhat fragmented final version.

Among the cast was Martin Woodhams, whose casting sparked controversy due to opposition from an actors’ union; his inclusion marked a rare instance of a non-professional actor participating. This production also marked the final screen appearance for actor Godfrey Winn.

Music

The film's unique soundtrack features Eartha Kitt performing the song "A Knight for My Nights."

Box office

Financially, the movie was successful and stood out as one of the top British releases in 1972. According to producer Ned Sherrin, its opening surpassed that of Up Pompeii, but a later power outage disrupted its progress, leading to earnings that primarily covered the production costs.

Critical

The Monthly Film Bulletin observed that although Howerd is a gifted comedian, the script constrained his performance; however, they praised standout scenes such as his rapid transformation into a chanting nun and his comedic confrontation with Rita Webb's Maid Marian. The Radio Times awarded the film two stars out of five, noting only a few moments of humor. Critic Leslie Halliwell labeled it a "patchy pantomime" that lacked assurance in its bawdy comedy.